The Jane Report
In somewhat of a shocker, Justin Bieber didn’t get any Grammy nominations during Wednesday’s announcement concert…and Taylor Swift only got one. If you’re a Taylor fan, don’t worry because her hot album, “Red” was released after the eligibility period for the 2013 awards closed. She’ll likely get a boatload of nominations next year. Bieber, on the other hand, was just snubbed and his manager wasn’t happy about it, tweeting “Grammy board u blew it on this one. The kid delivered. Huge successful album, sold out tour, and won people over.”
After being hospitalized for about a week, Kate Middleton has been allowed to return home. The duchess, pregnant with Prince William’s first child, was suffering from hyperemesis gravidarum, a severe form of morning sickness. She and the Prince will stay at Kensington Palace for a period of rest. Following Kate’s hospitalization, it was revealed that she is less than 12 weeks along in her pregnancy.
The empress of home crafting and good taste, Martha Stewart came down with salmonella in November after handling too many Thanksgiving birds. Stewart believes her illness came from all of the televised turkey demonstrations she had to perform in the weeks leading up to the holiday. She was in bed for days. In this illness, Stewart was lucky. According to the CDC, there are approximately 42,000 reported cases of salmonella poisoning annually with about 400 deaths as a result. Most stricken with the infection suffer diarrhea, fever and cramps. Poultry is a major source of the illness.
Ashley Judd is apparently serious about running for Senate…but she’s just not sure when. It was believed she would run in 2014 for the Kentucky Senate seat against Mitch McConnell, but now it seems she’s waiting for 2016 where her opponent would be Senator Rand Paul. Paul told a local radio station that Judd is “way damn too liberal for our country and for our state”…Judd responded, “I cherish Kentucky, heart and soul, and while I’m very honored by the consideration, we have just finished an election, so let’s focus on coming together to keep moving America’s families, and especially our kids, forward.”
Alec Baldwin also spoke out about his political ambitions, saying he’s giving them up for now. He would still love to run for mayor, but he can’t take the time to raise funds while he’s doing “30 Rock”.
Baldwin did an interview with Piers Morgan last night. Alec commented on his problems with the paparazzi over the years. He said the whole entertainment industry would be better off if all the paparazzi disappeared. If he could, he would flush them all down into the sewer and be done with them.
In case you didn’t see it, Jimmy Fallon and Tracy Morgan did a hilarious reading of “‘Twas the Night Before Christmas” on Wednesday. Jimmy read the actual story, and Tracy just kept interrupting with bizarre comments about it. This is the first verse, where Tracy complains about the mouse that wasn’t stirring.
Wendy Williams says she’s a Beyoncé fan . . . but that didn’t stop her from SLAMMING her on her show Wednesday. It was pretty harsh. She basically said Beyoncé sounds DUMB. Specifically, she said Beyoncé sounds like she only has a fifth-grade education . . . and you need subtitles to understand her when she talks.
Jimmy Fallon talked about the Obamas’ dog Bo being on the White House Christmas card. He joked it was weird when he signed it, “humps and kisses.”
Chris Rock is 47 years old. And apparently, 47 is the new 80. Because Chris steps into grumpy old man territory in the new issue of “Vanity Fair”, by complaining about the current state of comedy. Asked if today’s comedians are better than those he grew up on, Chris says, quote, “Hell [effin'] no.” He explains, quote, “Show me one guy or woman as funny as Rodney Dangerfield or as good as George Carlin, Richard Pryor, Bill Cosby, or Joan Rivers. ”There are a lot of good comics out there, no doubt, but as far as the quality of the comics goes, I think what you have is a bunch of situational comics. ”What we have now is black comics that work only black crowds, gay comics that do only gay crowds, and southern comics that only work down South, and so on with Asian, Latino, Indian, midgets, etc. ”The previous generation’s comics were better because they had to make everybody laugh. Richard Pryor could do ‘The Ed Sullivan Show’ and play the Apollo.” As for who stands out, he says, quote, “[Jerry] Seinfeld can work any crowd. Ellen [DeGeneres] can work any crowd. [George] Lopez can work any crowd. And a few more, but the rest of them are just situational comics.”
The Olson twins, Mary-Kate and Ashley, have released a new line of handbags and they carry the hefty price of $55,000! Starting December 12th, nine limited edition handbags from their fashion line “The Row” will go on sale online. The bags, which look more like backpacks, are created by artist Damien Hirst. They are made from black patent leather Nile crocodile skin and are embellished with an array of prescription pills in varying shapes, colors and sizes. A portion of the proceeds will be donated to UNICEF. The last time the twins came out with handbags, they sold for $39,000 each and they sold out!
Some guy on YouTube took the year’s biggest songs . . . like “Call Me Maybe,” “We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together” and “Gangnam Style” . . . and rewrote the lyrics using much more ADVANCED vocabulary.
After seven years of abstinence, Ford will be returning to the Super Bowl with an ad created by talk show host, Jimmy Fallon. The cost of the :60 spot on the broadcast will cost $8 million dollars. The ad will be touting the luxury of the Ford Lincoln.
ABC will be passing on the Pasa Doble for a while. After the show’s next season, “Dancing With The Stars” will air only once a year, instead of two. After 15 editions of the show since 2005, the once-top-rated show had disappointing ratings for the all star season. According to Disney CFO Jay Rasulo “people didn’t want to see people who could dance. They wanted people who couldn’t dance.” “Dancing” is set to return with a new edition in March 18th…but then fans will have to wait a year for the next series to start.
Lindsay Lohan is reportedly now in Boston with the band “The Wanted”, having traveled there with the band on their tour bus. She’s there as George Max’s invited guest. George, who recently broke up with girlfriend Michelle Keegan, says he definitely “doesn’t want a girlfriend, and is a single guy … but doesn’t mind having Lindsay around.”